I’ve spent too many hours on the phone to the DWP – I’ve reached my limit in being nice | Siobhan

As my dad’s carer, I’m always hanging on the phone or queuing for appointments. I’m trying mindfulness to soothe the rage

  • This article is part of the heat or eat diaries: a series from the frontline of Britain’s cost of living emergency

My dad, who I care for, is away for a couple of weeks. He’s gone to stay with my sister in the countryside so I’ve got some space, some time off. It gives me a break, although it’s not exactly party time. I don’t have any money so I watch a lot of TV, read books, chill at home. I probably sound like the dullest person – I just drink tea and eat bread.

It is weird being a carer. In quiet times, I might think about the future and the jobs I could do one day. I loved working as a florist before and I’m good at it, although I don’t think I could handle the customer service part any more. I’ve had it with people now. I’ve spent too many hours dealing with the Department for Work and Pensions (DWP), the NHS, hanging on the phone, queueing for appointments; I’ve reached my limit in trying to be nice to people – but the creative side of floristry, being in the backroom with your music and your flowers? I’d love that.

As told to Anna Moore. Siobhan is in her 30s and lives in the Midlands. Names have been changed

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