The pain of penetrative sex meant my partner and I exploring other options, and we found a new creativity in pleasure
The moment my gynaecologist uttered the word “vaginismus”, my heart sank in disbelief. I had spent the previous few months going from doctor to doctor to try to understand why I was suffering severe pain during penetrative sex. As a young, sexually liberated woman, it had never crossed my mind that a spontaneous tightening of my vagina could be the source of my pain. I was relieved I finally had a diagnosis, but my partner and I had previously enjoyed our sex life, and I couldn’t help but worry this diagnosis would sound its death knell.
Vaginismus can be caused by trauma, either physical mental, or, as in my case, it can occur for no obvious reason at all. It causes the vagina to suddenly tighten when something is inserted inside it, and its symptoms can be debilitating, causing burning, stinging and pain that can severely affect a sufferer’s mental health. Treatment can include psychosexual therapy, relaxation techniques and pelvic floor exercises.
Shiler Mahmoudi is a radio producer and journalist
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